Some cohabitors, it seems, are more equal than others, with one group showing all the telltale signs of disaster that previous research had revealed, and another, luckier group, living happily ever after.The difference between the two came down to their state of mind.(In reality, duration of cohabitation, alone, seems to have no implications for a couple's success or failure) For all these reasons, some cohabiting couples wind up cut off from important supports, with even their own family members reluctant to offer financial help or advice.In extreme cases, one or both members of the couple are either rejected or excluded by their partner's parents (not as rare as one would hope).The success gap between committed and uncommitted (or noncommittal) partners serves as a cautionary tale.
Given these many cultural and emotional obstacles, is it any wonder that couples wavering in their commitment often witness the demise of their relationship once they start living under the same roof?
"Do you think my boyfriend and I should live together? I could tell from her bloodshot eyes that she'd been pondering the question all night. " I asked "Frankly," she said, smiling weakly, "I'm afraid it'll ruin our relationship." I knew she wasn't exaggerating.
For many couples, living together is simply the next logical step in the progression of intimacy.
Why Living in Sin isn't for the Faint of Heart The dangers of mindlessly drifting into cohabitation--whether from a sense of economic pressure, a desire to "test" the relationship, or worries about living alone--have become increasingly clear.
Living together is an active long-term commitment, like having children, and without the proper preparation and nurturance of your relationship, you could be doing yourself and your partner more harm than good.